Wondering, Wandering, and Finding God Along the Way

Wondering, Wandering, and Finding God Along the Way

MacKenna Cook reflects on her week at Montreat

There is something about Montreat that is difficult to explain to people who have never been.

Ask ten students why they love it and you'll probably get ten different answers. Some will talk about the music. Others will talk about the mountains, the friendships, the late-night conversations, or the rare experience of being surrounded by thousands of teenagers who are actually happy to be at a church conference.

When I asked MacKenna Cook about her experience this year, she didn't start with a sermon or a keynote speaker.

She started with pickleball in the rain.

One afternoon, after grabbing coffee with youth member Katherine Buchanan, MacKenna found herself wandering around camp with students she had met only a day or two earlier. Rain had started falling across the valley, but instead of running for cover, they headed outside. They played pickleball on rain-soaked courts, splashed through puddles, wandered beside the creek that winds through Montreat, climbed over rocks, and spent the afternoon exploring together.

"It was so much fun," she said. "Just spontaneously hanging out with people I'd only known for a couple of days. I think that's one of the times I felt most alive."

For MacKenna, a rising junior at William Blount High School, Montreat felt different from the moment she arrived. She described it as one of the most welcoming places she has ever experienced. Everywhere she went, people introduced themselves, offered encouragement, and made room for others. In a world, especially for teenagers, that can often feel competitive, guarded, or judgmental, Montreat felt refreshingly open.

"I've never been in a more positive place. It was different than other church retreats I've been to," she said. "Every single person you talked to would encourage you or compliment you. Everyone was so welcoming. There was zero judgment."

She returned to that theme several times during our conversation. The friendships mattered. The worship mattered. The small groups mattered. But what seemed to surprise her most was how quickly a group of strangers began to feel like a community.

"I've never seen God working that powerfully in a group of strangers," she said. "Normally I'm pretty introverted at school, but at Montreat I just started talking to people, learning their stories, and getting to know them. It felt like everyone really cared about each other."

That experience of connection became especially important because MacKenna did not arrive at Montreat with everything figured out. Like many teenagers, and many adults, she carried questions with her. The past year had included some challenges and questions about faith that she had not been able to resolve.

“Between what's happening in the world and some struggles in my own life, I've been questioning my faith a lot this year," she said.

One of the things she appreciated most about Montreat was that no one seemed afraid of those questions. Throughout the week, speakers and leaders encouraged students to think deeply, wrestle honestly, and engage with faith in a way that was thoughtful rather than simplistic. MacKenna filled pages of notes throughout the conference, and several quotes have stayed with her since returning home.

One statement in particular grabbed her attention:

"If God is only a Sunday morning idea, then our faith will crumble."

"I thought that was really powerful," she said. "Faith has to be bigger than Sunday morning - it has to fit in everyday life, everyday situations."

Another quote spoke directly into the doubts she had been carrying:

"You can't really have faith without doubt."

"I needed to hear that," she said. "I've been questioning a lot this year, and sometimes that feels wrong. But what I learned at Montreat helped me realize that wondering and questioning are a normal part of faith."

What stayed with me after our conversation was how comfortable MacKenna was talking about questions.

A lot of teenagers feel pressure to have things figured out. A lot of adults do too. But when she described her week at Montreat, she wasn't talking about finding all the answers. She was talking about learning that faith is big enough to hold the questions.

Again and again, she came back to the quotes she had written in her notebook, the conversations in small group, and the realization that she wasn't the only person wrestling with uncertainty. Instead of leaving discouraged by what she didn't know, she seemed energized by the idea that faith is something you continue to explore.

One quote from the week still sticks with her: "The world needs more wonderers and wanderers."

By the end of our conversation, it was easy to see why.

MacKenna is thoughtful. She pays attention. She asks good questions. She notices people. She notices ideas. She notices the things that many of us rush past.

For those considering Montreat in the future, her advice comes quickly.

"Definitely go," she said. "It will change your view of yourself, your faith, and other people. It will make you feel loved in a way you might not expect. You'll make lifelong friends, and you'll learn to talk about your faith in a completely different way."

As our conversation came to a close, I found myself smiling at the notebook she had filled with quotes and reflections from the week. Some students come home from Montreat talking about the activities. Others remember the music or the scenery. MacKenna came home talking about ideas, questions, conversations, and faith.

That curiosity is one of her gifts.

First Presbyterian is so lucky to have people like MacKenna in our community. She is thoughtful without being cynical, curious without being despondent, and willing to wrestle with difficult questions without letting go of her faith. Listening to her reflect on Montreat gave me hope for the future of the church.

The world needs young people who are willing to think deeply, love generously, and keep searching for God even when the path isn't perfectly clear. MacKenna is already doing that, and we’re so excited to see where it will take her!